Thank you all who showed friendship and support after that dog incident yesterday. I was so so so shaken up-- and your amazon runner is not easily shaken.
I have been thinking about this and I don't believe that I can carry a weapon to use against these dogs that would be lethal. Not that I am incapable of using violence to save my dog's life or my own. I am capable. But it would have to be a reaction to the moment. It's the fact that walking around with a lethal weapon would make the violence premeditated for me and I am uncomfortable with that even though I am acting defensively and am not the aggressor.
I believe in the law of attraction and I am afraid that if I prepare too much for violence, the universe will accommodate me and send it. So tomorrow, Jeff is taking me to the army/navy store for pepper spray. I will always carry that and a camera from now on when I walk. Hopefully this will be enough if there is another incident. If I can document it on camera and survive the ordeal, it could be the last time they do it.
I talked with two of the neighbors who've had incidents with the woman with the four dogs. In both cases, these people were on their own property with their own dogs when the vicious pack came by. Although in these two incidents, the pack of four happened to be leashed at the time, once they saw the other dog they struggled to break free and succeeded in both cases. One time, they pulled and knocked their owner on her backside, and dragged her on her butt across the lawn to attack a dog that was minding its own business on its own property.
In both of these cases, the potential victims made it to safety as they were so close to their own front door, so the police were not called. Although the police were told about these other incidents yesterday, they said that unless it was reported at the time, it's like it never happened.
If these neighbors had reported these incidents and I had reported the previous ones that we had, then there would already be a documented pattern established that the woman cannot control the dogs when they are leashed, that she often lets them off-leash knowing they bite, and that they are dangerous. No one wants to call the police on a neighbor and stir up divisive energy in the neighborhood, but this is one case where, in hindsight, I wish we all had.
There are children and elderly people who also walk their dogs in that tract of woods. The kids and teens also go in there to goof around and do dumb kid things. There is no where to go for help in there. One day, something is going to happen in there with those dogs that is more serious- then they'll probably take action but it will be too late. (Sigh, I pray this can be avoided)
Anyway, I got up this morning and walked to the gym. I have to walk right by the house with the four dogs when I take my walks to the gym. I don't have any pepper spray yet and I was nervous, but they weren't around.
It was pouring rain and cold-- so it was a miserable walk, made worse by the fact that I didn't sleep last night. I FINALLY got to the gym and hopped on the chest press machine first. I could not push the 115 pounds that I was able to do the last time I was in there. As I went down the line, it was the same thing on all of the machines. It was like the strength I've built up took a vacation for the day.
Finally, I was on one machine and I don't know what happened but all of a sudden I just started crying and couldn't stop. I had an extremely busy and stressful week capped off by the dog incident. I could not sleep last night as I was still upset and was up until 3am. I am not a woman who cries, so this was a big deal.
DH had been on the rowing machine and he always comes over when he's done to tell me how long he will be in the pool, which he saves for last. When he saw the state I was in, he just took me home.
I mentioned that I ate stuffing and gravy yesterday in moderation. Well, you would not believe how my body has reacted to that. I have not felt right since. I feel like I ate a jar of paste. For months I have been living on high quality protein, organic veggies and a modest amount of whole grains and fruit. No sugar or chemicals. I guess my body is intolerant now of the old way of eating---yikes.
I will not be eating any of the leftovers except for the turkey. I am not upset about how my body reacted to those foods because it will be all the easier for me not to be tempted by them. Next year, I won't be eating the stuffing or the gravy and I doubt very much that I will feel deprived.
We're thinking of taking Zeke somewhere to run tomorrow where he won't be attacked; and try to clear ourselves of the energy of the past week and just move forward. If I can, I will do a chaLEAN or a boot camp work out today, but if I end up not doing so and I don't reach my goal for the week in terms of fitness hours....... oh well.
Thank you all for being here and for listening! I hope you are well.